We Matched Over a Shared Dislike of Online Dating — and Fell in Love

We Matched Over a Shared Dislike of Online Dating — and Fell in Love

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My profile bio was a bit of a risk. Instead of listing my hobbies or what I was looking for in a partner, I wrote: “Honestly, I’m not convinced this online dating thing works, but I’d love for someone to prove me wrong.” It was cynical, born from years of swiping fatigue and conversations that fizzled out after two days. I expected it to get me zero matches.

To my surprise, I got a message from a woman named Anna. Her opening line wasn’t a "hi" or a compliment, but a simple, “I feel the exact same way.” We spent the first hour of our chat on https://www.sofiadate.com/ not flirting, but complaining. We bonded over our mutual disdain for ghosting, for profiles that looked like catalogues, and for the pressure to be constantly witty and charming. It was the most refreshingly honest conversation I’d ever had on a dating app. There were no games, no pretense. Just two people admitting they were tired of the digital meat market and longed for something real.

That shared cynicism became the foundation of our connection. Because we had both given up on the "idea" of online dating, we were free to just be ourselves. We didn't try to impress each other with polished versions of our lives. I told her about my failed attempts at baking bread; she told me about her terrible taste in reality TV. We were vulnerable and messy and human. The irony was beautiful: by giving up on the game of online dating, we had started to win. We weren't trying to "sell" ourselves anymore. We were just sharing. And in that sharing, we found exactly what we thought was impossible to find online: a genuine, deep, and lasting love. It turned out the best way to use a dating app was to connect with someone over how much you disliked using dating apps.